The Ex; by me

My Heart aches……..

Loneliness is alien to me
Has always been
Yet I feel it’s presence keenly
Because you’re not with me

When you’re not around
Time seems cruel
Had never been so
But it is now…

Yet I know when you appear
Conflict is all that will be
Filmed
Yet I know when you appear
Dissonance is all that will be
Felt
So why do I miss you?

Why is my nervous system feeling
Your absence so keenly?
When did our hearts become so
Keenly knotted together?
When did my immune system
Recognize you?
When did my DNA register you?
When did I ever feel loneliness
Without a man?

I’m angry
But have no one to blame
Tears threaten
But have no one to flow to
So I write a poem
And wonder it’s use?

Does it ameliorate my feelings?
Or just leaves one with a
Satisfied feeling?
Perhaps writing history is
Relishing
And gazing at it a decade later
Miraculous

Maybe I’ll know it’s significance
Another life
That decade after
And maybe I’ll smile
And know it was worth it

But I’m still found in now and
Today
Still sitting here sipping my cup
Of tea away
Missing my love
Yearning for his presence
And I’m still typing away
How my heart aches
The solace of a poet
03/04/2013
Cayenne*

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